How to Say “No” Without Softening It

“No” is a remarkably small word for something women can spend an extraordinary amount of energy trying not to say.

Instead, we soften it. We apologise before it, explain after it and occasionally bury it beneath so many polite qualifications that the original no becomes almost impossible to locate. “I’m really sorry, I’d normally love to, but I’m just incredibly busy at the moment…” can sometimes mean exactly what it says. Other times, it means no, dressed in a cardigan and desperately hoping nobody asks a follow-up question.

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